I have totally given up trying to write the next great American novel. I’m just trying to write the next great American text message. I overheard a couple of teenagers talking outside the doors to my latest show, a high-energy night of comedy and music at Kentucky Christian University. One girl said to the other, “Where have you been? You didn’t answer my email; you didn’t return my texts; you didn’t do a status update on FaceBook and there are no new pix on Pinterest or Instagram; there isn’t even anything new on your blog! ARE YOU OKAY?” The other teen looked up from her Android and said, “Did you check Twitter?” There was a moment’s pause, the one girl checked her Twitter account, and then they both laughed. And that made me think. What if there is someone here on U.S. soil without an email account? What if someone has no homepage, no website, no FaceBook or MySpace or Instagram or Pinterest account? What if someone out there doesn’t do Twitter? What if they don’t even have a computer, a smartphone or even a simple iPod? They have no internet address! THEY ARE VIRTUALLY HOMELESS! Cool gig for me this summer! I’m performing at The Springfield Sliders baseball game in Roberts Stadium, Springfield, Illinois, this Sunday July 14! I’m really excited about it – tickets here: http://www.springfieldsliders.com/news/?article_id=223 Thanks for reading!