My Blog

Investment Opportunities

June 17, 2014


Last weekend, as the Middle East fell into its never-ending reprise of sectarian violence – Suni vs. Shiite, which is kinda like Baptists versus Methodists, only different, as in CHRISTIANS DON’T BEHEAD ONE ANOTHER, THEY JUST FIND A NEW CHURCH – President Obama chose to ignore the myriad of crises surrounding his administration and played […]

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Politically Correct Literature

May 13, 2014


The truth is that many, many great books have titles that are oppressive or some sort of -ism (you can take your pick). I have come to the rescue! Here are some great titles from literature that I’ve taken the liberty to re-name, in the spirit of progressivism, love, peace and fairness – so nobody’s […]

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NUKE-LEE-YAR versus NUKE-YOU-LAR

April 28, 2014


Can we get it out in the open? The word is spelled “nuclear,” and according to Webster’s is pronounced “nooklee-er.” Got it? Good. It’s out in the open now and we all know how to say the word. So let’s move on. The countries we worry most about having a nuclear weapon are Iran and […]

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April Is the Cruelest

April 16, 2014


Not even T.S. Eliot could have imagined the cruelty of April 2014. This without mentioning my Cubs getting off to their usual lose-twice-as-many-as-they-win start (4-and-8 as of this writing). They say death always comes in 3’s. The comedy world has lost 3 very funny, very different, very influential people in the past month. I never […]

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Mouse in the House

March 25, 2014


From the forthcoming book, Taylor Mason: Irreversible.       “The mouse is in the house. Mee-ow!”               – Eek-A-Mouse (reggae musician) I’m always a little apprehensive when my iPhone rings or buzzes. Especially if the caller ID comes up and its someone from home, Marsia or the boys. I […]

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