Congraduations!!!

May 20, 2013


I wrote a song just for you – here it is!  ConGrads

Sincere congratulations to those of you graduating from college this spring, and to those of you who will be offering living quarters to those who are graduating this spring.

Quick advice for job seekers: a great way to get to an interview first is to read the obituaries!

You have a lot going for you, regardless off your major. You are unique. Just like everyone else.

As a graduate in 2013, you can take solace in the fact that some attorney out there will back you in a lawsuit against your university, so you can sue them for the right to be stupid!

That same attorney will help female grads fight for royalties from spring break appearances on Girls Gone Wild videos.

If all else fails, remember that grad school is the snooze button on real life. You can keep hitting that button up until the time you are eligible for social security. That’s what many of your professors have done!

I know your goal: an exciting, value-enhancing job with a corner office that affords you clothing from Abercrombie & Fitch, or at least Banana Republic. You need a cool apartment; a hot Euro/Japanese car; the perfect relationship with someone as smart, ambitious and well dressed as you; plus extra income to throw parties showing the world what you’ve got. The job itself? I have no idea….

But on a serious note, I hope that someday you will be able to say, “Fame and fortune did not bring me happiness.”

GOOD LUCK!
Taylor